Superpowers, balance and loud music
There I am, wearing a custom-made bracelet to a live gig, in the company of two 14-year-olds. That’s a sentence I never thought I would say.
THINK. We live in a strange world. One must engineer balance and rest instead of just drifting into it. Make plans to experience something. Little spontaneity, loads of planning. But it is worth it, a hundred percent.
Whether one is in a corporate job or not, going to a live music show seems like a journey to another dimension. With time and place set well in advance, we count days and hours before joining fellow fans in a walk to the event venue. The closer we are, the more we realize we are part of a movement, overflowing streets and parking lots. Depending on the artist and genre, there can be some artifacts and dressing up, too! We immerse in a crowd, as if it was a collective organism. The show starts, bass sounds come through our chests, and gaze centres on a stage. For a couple of hours, nothing else exists.
Every once in a while, I consciously seek to change my routines. I enjoy random experiences. Occasional disruption to what is a rigid schedule. And I deeply care about my daughter. Which was why blocked the afternoon out, read my last email for the day and left to see an alternative pop star Melanie Martinez playing live in Dublin. That explains the bracelet!
That evening was just one of portals to another world. In a noisy world we live in, when not only music is loud, these seem harder and harder to find. But paying attention, and a little bit of planning, do miracles.
FEEL. One of my recent conversations was about letting people in. This is most certainly a position of vulnerability. But just consider how often we have no idea what is going on in the lives of others. We are making assumptions, filling the void. We are projecting our own views, framing others in our narratives. We are increasingly afraid to ask - what if we are then confronted with an ugly reality? We tend to look away, as the shoes of others can be unsettling, discomforting, difficult. But what if it is the opposite?
As my son and I were walking our dogs one evening, another teenage topic came up: superpowers. After we debated undeniable benefits of shapeshifting, teleportation, and flight, we argued about mind reading.
Knowing what is going on in minds (and hearts) of others is both a blessing and a burden, same as the glass is both half-full and half-empty. I sometimes feel like the clutter of my own thoughts is too much, let alone absorbing those that belong to others. And this is way before one even gets to deep, intimate reflections! Trying to contain more than what our mind is producing is exhausting. Fact.
At the same time, we live increasingly more in our own bubbles. Amplified by digital, there is a risk that we will be locked out in a mini universe that is unique yet ubiquitous, for us alone. And lonely, too. Being able to be vulnerable for a while lets people in. Chances are that some will only take a glance and leave. But others will stay and help.
So don't rely on mind- (and heart-) reading. Know thy neighbour!
DO. I need to practice what I preach! I certainly feel thrown out of balance at work, facing demands of a double role. As Caring as I am, it is difficult to gather distance and say no. One of the toughest aspects of building relationships is knowing when to use a 'No' and create boundary. My boundaries are definitely being tested right now.
Allowing balance into your life is an active act. This is why I decided to delay my Friday (oh well, sometimes weekend) reflection routine to Monday. Immediate benefits I am noticing are freshness of thought, but also a peculiar discomfort. Letting the imperfection in. Hurts a little, yes, but with some luck, it would create a pattern of reaction, nearly some muscle memory of things that should worry us and those that shouldn't.
Curious to hear how you are finding your balance - and what superpower you feel. Everyone has it.
